Your Attention Please

This is a serious fucking occasion, people.


Like, somber music and everything.


Or, failing that, Seven Devils.


I'm here to announce something important.


Something earth-fucking-shattering.


I hereby grant the Page of Cups, my sister, Alice Mason, Chelsea Balisong, a new title.


She is now the Queen of Motherfucking Wands (Motherfucking optional)


Now give her a standing ovation, plebeians.


There's a new queen on the block.


Also haha, Ten doesn't get a promotion.


You will.


In time.


You all are lucky you have someone on hand who can make these sorta calls.

Trouble

transcript

Penny(me):  Put her down on the table.  Make sure she's lying flat.
Tara: I don't...o-okay.
P:  Tara.
No response
P:  Tara, I need you with me.  This is important, all right?  Don't flip the fuck out on me right now.  I need does-things Tara, not pussies-out Tara.
T:  Okay.  Okay.
P:  Swords, how does it feel?
Jeanette: grimacing I-it feels like I've been shot in the leg.
P:  Good.  Take off Jeanette's pants as best you can.
J: ...can't you do this without stripping me?
P:  We either cut them off or take them off.  It's not like the room's full of boys you ridiculous fucking prude.
T:  Okay.  deep breath Okay, what now?
P:  Do you see an exit--
interruption.  Alice/Chelsea enters the room.
A:  I got it!  Jesus, that's a lot of blood.  Is she all..
P:  Shh!  Tara, do you see an exit wound?
T:  I don't...yes.  I think so, I mean.
P:  Do you or don't you?
T:  It's kind of ragged, I can't tell.
P:  Whatever.  We keep going under the assumption that the bullet's not in there.
T:  But what...
P:  People have gone their whole lives with things worse than bullets in them.  If it's in there we can get rid of it when she has more blood, which she's losing the more I have to explain things to you idiots.
P:  Page, do you have the suture?
A:  What the fuck is a suture?
P:  sigh Curved needle and thread.
A:  Oh!  Duh.  Right here...is she going to be alright?  Does she need my blood?  I have a lot of blood.
P:  She'll be fine if we can get her sewn up soon.  Okay.  Tara.  I'm going to need you to do exactly what I tell you to do.
T:  I'm not sure if I...
P:  You've got the steadiest hands of all of us.  You can do it and you need to do it now.
T:  Okay.  I can do this.
A:  You better.
P:  Shut the fuck up and let Tara work.

Long story short, we were led into a trap.

She's fine, by the way.  More or less.  One more addition to her scar collection.

Fuck these people.  Whoever they are.

Hear that, Flaming Ass?  Fuck.  You.

Intermission

I could tell you, and all the people following us, about our plans, how we're on the move, etc.  I could talk about my sister and Jeanette and their sickening relationship.  I could talk about how Tara's been all weird since that Pete Rivers bullshit.  I could post about any number of important, extremely relevant things.

Instead it's music video time.

Bam.

Chelsea

Has lost computer privileges.

transcript

Girl With One Eye Ringtone heard playing.  Phone is answered.
Jeanette:  "Hey, Tara?"
Myself(Penny):  "No."
J:  "******, good.  We're in Hope.  Where the fuck are you guys?  Tara's on IM but she's not answering."
P:  "She's busy."
J:  "Okay.  Where are you?"
P:  "I don't think you want to come here right now."
J:  "What?  Why not?"
P:  "Your friend is a whore."
J:  "WHAT?"
P:  "She's a strumpet.  A woman of loose moral character."
P:  "She is the slut.  It's her."
J:  "******, what the fuck are you talking about?"
P:  "Exactly."
J:  "Just fucking tell me what's going on."
P:  "Fucking is what's going on.  Specifically, Peter is making a woman out of Tara."
A half minute of silence
P:  "Are you still there?"
J:  "That's bullshit."
P:  "Unfortunately not.  They're in the room next door.  I think they're going to be at it for a while."
J:  "Tara wouldn't..."
P:  "Tara is.  She is right now.  I have good ears.  So you might not want to come by."
J:  "Bullshit I don't.  Where the fuck are you?"
Chelsea:  (background)  "What's going on?"
P:  "You really should tell her."
J:  "Shut the fuck up."
P:  "Hey, look on the bright side.  Now that you know the love of your life loves the cock, maybe you can give my sister a chance."
J:  (on the border of enraged)  "Are you trying to make me punch you when we meet?"
P:  "If punching a blind depressed girl will make you feel better, by all means."
J:  "Okay, what-the-fuck-ever.  We're going to go to a motel or a restaurant or something.  Call us when you want to act like a fucking adult."
P:  "A motel?  Taking me up on my advice?"
The phone is hung up on the other end.


Nothing like a little trolling to make oneself feel better.

Oh jesus they're still at it.

I

hate cemeteries.

hate walking around all night looking for something that isn't there.

also hate Timberwolves, because they were at the cemetery and we had to hide from them.

hate Pete Rivers's  useless ass.

hate how he can't do anything because his two personalities are fighting each other too much.

hate how

'm almost sympathizing with him, because

feel the less lucid side getting hold.

'm not sure how much longer

can hold out either.

've been holding out so well, too.  But every dam must eventually break.  Chaos is the ultimate force in the universe, regardless of what every wannabe dictator has told you.  Eventually everything breaks down.  My sanity is a comforting wall, keeping Him out, because he looked into my eyes and

saw everything.  In that brief moment, it was all clear to me.  But that wrongness, that terrible light in His gaze Burned a part of me away, and not just my eyes.  Some important part of me went with them.

can't stand it.  Knowing

'm not whole anymore.  A piece of me is gone and

don't even remember what it was anymore.  Was it important?  Was it pure?  Maybe it was my love.  Maybe all

feel now is an obligation to Chelsea.  My precious sister.   But maybe

never felt love the same way everyone else did, either.

understand it objectively, but there's some subjective part of it that eludes me.

can't express it the way

should.  The way normal people do.

There was a guy, in the message board.  His name was Will,

guess.

knew him as WTRainbow.  We kind of had a thing but

abandoned him after the Lovers promoted me to Queen.

should have kept contact.  Not sure if

loved him.  It was a stupid internet romance.  But he cared for me and

just left.  No goodbye, no explanation.

A bit of my humanity is gone.  Is it gone for you, Jeanette?  Do you feel it?  Something in your heart, twisted and cut free like your eye was?  Like that pit in the center of the asterisk you call an eye socket is more than just in your flesh?

wish we could talk more.

guess we do someday, don't we?  We've seen the same visions, after all.

should sleep some.  Better sleep with one

open.

GODDAMNIT CHELSEA

STOP FLIRTING WITH JEANETTE IT'S NOT NATURAL.

AND I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT BISEXUALITY I'M TALKING ABOUT BEING ATTRACTED TO JEANETTE.  IT'S NOT RIGHT AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD ABOUT IT.

THIS KID IS KIND OF CREEPY AND OBVIOUSLY A FEW CROWS SHORT OF A MURDER.  WHY IS HE STILL WITH US?

GODDAMNIT TARA.

ALSO SHOUTING IS FUN.

Road Trip, Redux

This is fun.

And by fun I mean it's boring and Tara's musical taste is terrible and I just had her type that for me.  ((Your face is dumb and also you are dumb--Tara))

But she's nice.  We spend a lot of the time talking about the old days, back when we were dumb kids on a message board about a year ago, giving flesh to a personal nightmare of mine.

Jeanette is on her way, I think.  Infuriatingly, she has my Page with her.  I guess she's Chelsea Balisong now.  I guess I deserve it, though, for not stopping Tara.  Touche, Swords.

More if anything interesting happens.

ps.  It won't.  Not until we hit New Jersey.

Hope to see you all again soon. (heh heh)

Ahem

I have it on good authority that Jeanette spent her birthday watching My Little Pony:  Friendship is Magic with my Page.

That is all.

Happy birthday, Queen of Swords.

A Moment of Lucidity

It's so embarrassing to have to rely on someone else to perform basic tasks of living.  At least I have my Page.  I would hate to rely on a stranger.  To have someone I didn't know, didn't trust, and couldn't see, loose in my private living space.

The nurse came by today to look at my eye sockets.  See how they're healing up.  The glass inside is still foreign to me, the alien pressure still itchy inside my head.  Swords probably knows what I'm talking about.  I wish I didn't need to have them in, but I'd rather the sockets don't collapse.

The burns are healing well.  My parents are looking into donors, but I doubt it will come of anything.  I'm fairly certain even if by some miracle I received intact, working eyes, the Lovers would take them again.  At any rate, it's looking like I'll make as much of a recovery as I can given the circumstances.

It goes without saying, but I really miss being able to see.  The only time I do anymore is in my dreams, where I'm speaking to a one-eyed goth cowgirl in some sort of train station.  I wish I could type these up myself, without relying on my Page (that's Penny-speak for little sister).  I hope she's typing what I want.  She's loyal but she can be, well, a little sister at times.
:P
I hope Swords is alright.  This might sound strange for you to hear, especially you, but I do.  I think we could have been friends in another world, another time.  Now I'm not sure what we are.  I know that antagonizing her keeps my Page safe. In the end that's all that matters.

I'm sorry, Swords Jeanette.  I really am.  This story won't end happily for either of us.  I'm not sure how I know that, but I do.  Just take solace in the fact that it ends worse for me, and live your life as best you can. Smile for once.  Have fun.  Please.  Fate may have dealt you a bad hand but, in the end, the cards aren't foolproof.  Fate's gears won't grind against you if you decide to pull yourself from them for a while.

Speaking of cards:

The Lovers is moving into conflict with The Devil, with The Queen of Swords caught in the middle.  Be careful.

I think I'm backsliding a bit.  Oh well.  It was nice being sane while it lasted.